Friday, August 12, 2011
Is it reasonable to ask your boyfriend to delete people he has a romantic/sexual history with from Facebook?
First of all, I know I am jealous and possessive. I'm not in the least bit dishonest about that. I'll try to fit all the important details efficiently. My boyfriend and I started dating officially about three weeks ago. It's relevant to note that he recently ended (not amicably) a six year relationship a month or so before we met. It's also relevant to note that he still has to talk to his ex since they have some joint responsibilities. When we became official, he was reluctant to change his status on Facebook. When he did, he deleted the update from his News Feed so people wouldn't see and couldn't comment on it unless they specifically went to his info page. In addition, he never once mentioned anything even remotely related to me in a status, yet we see each other every day and have had some pretty amazing times already. So, the issue came up that it bothers me that he is still friends with his most recent ex, as well as other exes, and people he met online or hooked up with, on Facebook. This makes me uncomfortable as I don't want any of them to be like, in touch with him. I don't want them to IM him, or see or comment on his statuses or pictures, or to know what's going on in his life and vice versa. So I asked him to delete them, the logic being, if they are not in his life anymore or not "friends" there is no reason to be friends with them online. And this bothers me excessively. To me it's like, not only does he not want people to know that he is with me, but he also doesn't want to sever any ties to people he's been involved with in the past. I try to do so many romantic things for him, as much as I can (cooked him dinner, let him do something intimate I never let anyone else do before, etc.) yet to me it seems like he doesn't even care enough to delete people from Facebook that he doesn't even talk to anymore. It makes me feel like somethings wrong. Anyway... what do you think? Am I just crazy or is there something wrong?
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